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Natural Awakenings San Diego

Reflections Upon Soul and Self: An Interview with Sonia Choquette

Jan 31, 2013 10:21AM ● By Linda Sechrist

Sonia Choquette is an author and global leader with a singular focus: to liberate people from the limitations that come from falsely perceiving the world and themselves with only five senses, when, in fact, we have six. She awakens the sleeping giant called the human spirit and puts it back into its proper place of leadership in every person’s life she touches.

What is authentic spirited living?

Authentic spirited living means expressing and living the “you” that is separate and independent of all the influences that shaped and coerced you into abandoning yourself in order to fit in. It’s the self that you naturally express from your heart, as well as the author of your life, rather than the follower of someone else’s agenda.

The words authentic and author share the same root. This indicates to me that spirited living means returning to the true self that is not looking for definition or for approval through the eyes and influences of others.

Children come into the world knowing fully who they are. Through social conditioning and the influences of the family of origin, children abandon that knowing in order to fit in. I encourage everyone to give up the self-abandonment model of fitting in. Simply allow yourself to belong and express as the spirited you, the source of real happiness.

Is focusing on the self selfish?

Identifying your spirit’s top priority each day and making it your goal means that you are not only assuring the highest expression of own self, but you are also ensuring that you are bringing the highest and most authentic vibration of you to others. This sets up a cascade effect of positive energy.

When we are self-centered in awareness and work from an appreciation, as well as a love and respect, for the self, we are no longer needy and looking for others to fill our void. Self-centered awareness is the most loving choice we can make because it allows us to show up for others with our gifts, energy and presence, versus trying to fill our void through codependent and manipulative behaviors.

Christ said to love your neighbor as yourself—not instead of yourself. Love yourself as the miracle of the beautiful spirit that you are. If you can find real affection, kindness and appreciation for yourself, then you can avail yourself to the world in the best possible way.

What part does self-love play in a relationship?

Your relationship will reflect and play out to the degree that you love yourself. The more you love yourself, the more you actually see and appreciate another person as the individual self that they are. You are no longer looking at them from the perspective of “What can you do for me?”

When we are self-centered in awareness and work from an appreciation, as well as a love and respect, for the self, we are no longer needy and looking for others to fill our void.


We are vibratory creatures. As we raise our vibration of self-love, we attract others who are also self-loving, thus we have better relationships.

How do we practice self-love?

It’s important to get a clear notion of the self as a spirit, rather than an ego identity. Anyone who has ever witnessed a newborn baby take its first breath sees that when breath animates the physical body, life begins. This breath, the essence of self, is the spirit that we want to see ourselves as.

When we begin to see the self in terms of a beautiful spirit that opens our eyes every day to look out, be present and create, we see ourselves less in terms of our experiences, our history, an education, financial accomplishments or physical appearance. We are none of these things.

Is there a simple way to learn self-love?

Put your hand on your heart. Take a breath in. As you let it out, make the sound “Ah,” which is the sound of God—Allah, Buddha, Yahweh, etc. Feel the sound resonating in your heart. Begin to name aloud the things that you love. Tune into how you feel just thinking and naming these things.

Do this simple practice one minute every day and it will open your heart to the divine and connect you with your authentic self. It will put a smile on your face and bring you home to you and what self-love really feels like.

Anyone who walks into your energy field after this exercise will be immediately uplifted because you’re open and happy. This is called entrainment. The dominant vibration entrains and raises the lower vibration.

Is there such a thing as soulmate?

Yes, there are soul mates. However, our culture’s idea of a soulmate is unfortunately wrapped up in the myth of Prince Charming on a white horse and happily ever after. This idea is the quintessential codependency model of, “Someone else will complete me.”

We have many soulmates. They enter our lives to help us grow our soul and complete ourself. Some soulmates cause more problems than they create joy. However, we grow, learn and expand, and are better for this.


Learn more at SoniaChoquette.com.